My Diary #048

Dear Tigey,

My classes are done! Now I have time for other things. Like… like…

Entry #048 (Apr 10 2022)

Table of Contents

Tasting freedom at…
ට  School
ට  Life
ට  Games
ට  Plushie of the Week #46
ට  Song of the Week #23
ට  Memory Snippet of the Week #30
ට  Dreams


My last class session for my EASIA 441 Haiku class was this Wednesday. It was a presentation for our final essay, which is due in two weeks. I was already done most of the essay, as I noted in My Diary #046, and I spent the last two weeks trimming it down from 5250 words to 4300, which was the maximum my professor said she’d allow. I then spent a couple days summarizing that into a 10 minute presentation and powerpoint.

I found it interesting that I presented the presentation in past tense because I had already finished writing it, but everyone presented theirs in present or future tense, mostly future, because they were currently writing on it or hadn’t started yet. A good number didn’t even have a solid topic yet. Now, my topic isn’t perfect, I can see some problems with a few holes in what I wrote myself, but this sort of helped assuage me that I was ahead of the curve at least. I only had one class (plus work obligations) to deal with though, not five, and I had no final exam stress to deal with, so I do understand why everyone else is behind.

I submitted the final paper just before the presentation as I wasn’t expecting (and didn’t get) any helpful feedback from the presentation itself on the topic. I still have two weeks if I want to edit it any further, but I don’t. But I can. But I won’t. I really enjoyed the class though, it was a lot of fun, minus the stress over the final paper, but now that I’m actually done the final paper, I more or less liked that too as I learnt a ton of interesting things while actually researching it. The problem was finding the niche for a good paper topic. The class was also easier than the other 400-level class I took, one of Visual and Material Studies in East Asian Buddhism back in Winter 2020, and I appreciated that. I’m now done one of my degree requirements, that of needing two 400-level courses related to my degree.

My bad haiku of the week also commemorates the ending of the fully online class.

an empty classroom
faces you can never touch
chairs lie here and there


I’m feeling better this week! A couple small down spots still but by and large much more positive than before. Cooking nice food also helps. Full speed ahead into the future!!

We had our first 20 degree Celsius weather day this week, so most of the snow is gone now. I took several walks this week, and a minor miracle happened on one of them, when I was on the way to the library and then the Asian supermarket. A Caucasian girl that was passing me in the opposite direction when I was walking through a parking lot stopped me to tell me that she loved my style, and I thanked her. That was random! I’m not sure why, as I’m not photogenic or pretty, but I do get people saying that to me now and then, usually complimenting my skirt in particular or my pink/black colour combination, and it always feels nice when that happens. It’s a positive moodlet that lasts the entire day!

I do need to find a new walking app or two though. The World Walking app that I used last summer/fall just constantly crashes when I try to access my % completion on the Jewels of Japan tour now (I’m at 45%, I can see it on the website, but not in app). Plus it doesn’t have a way for me to save my walking routes, which I’d like.

Some video processing rambling notes for myself for the future. I tried the optimized media technique in the article I linked last week when complaining about the 23 hour video, and that generated 1 terabyte of data and did cut the time in half but bloated the file size to a point that it wouldn’t even fit on my hard disk, so I had to plug in an external disk and use that for storage. Low budget and all that. I was still definitely doing something wrong though since I still wasn’t getting the speed results I was hoping for, but I decided that especially for giant videos like that, with my current rig, I was probably way overdoing it and I went to look for other methods of encoding the videos.

My default encoder for all the other videos so far was H.264 (which for this video was going to take 20-26 hours), and after doing a Mediainfo run on my video, I learnt my DJI Pocket 2 was recording in 4k 30/60 fps 4:2:0 8 bit. I started reading up on codecs, noting that the optimized media generation was doing DNxHR HQ (which after media generation still was going to take 13 hours to process, and the filesize from a quick test looked like it was going to be HUGE), which was probably too high-tier for what I needed and could reasonably run on my dinky little machine, especially since I was only going to upload them on Youtube and that was it. I am actually more concerned with speed than quality for my output as long as the quality is decent, so I tried a few other codecs, ending up with H.265, after looking up several guides on the difference between that and H.264. Not that I understand it all still. This one went a lot better though, and allowed me to save the file in mp4 format instead of Quicktime (which I don’t like.. I have an inbuilt hatred for Apple), and most importantly, it only took 3 hours to process and came up with a nice, palatable 13GB file for a 3 hour recording. Palatable compared to the numbers the DNxHR one was pulling, something like taking up more than 1 GB per minute on the same footage.

Anyway I tested the H.265 codec on both this long video as well as a walk that I did on April 08th, and uploaded both to Youtube, and you can find them attached at the end of this blog post too. They turned out decently, I think. The April 08 recording I did is amateurish, I never noticed for example that the camera was tilted for a good chunk of the walk when I was carrying a bunch of shopping bags back home too (how does that even happen? Damn gimbal and damn camera with so many settings I still have yet to fully understand..), so that’s a pity, but it’s still a decent Chronicle, and the encoding at least turned out fine. The end video actually is several clips joined together in one, since I stopped and started it at various points on the trip, so I wanted to test making chapters on Youtube with it. So it should have chapters too. Not sure why they aren’t showing as per the moment I’m submitting this, but maybe because the HD version has taken a day and a half to process now. Anyway, it’s slow but steady progress toward becoming a better vlogger, right. I hadn’t used the camera since January so I needed to get acquainted with my old friend again.

Edit: I did eventually find out that the reason H.264 takes so long to process is that H.264 was processing using the CPU instead of the GPU, and there was an option to change that to GPU so it took just 2 hours instead of 23 hours. The option name is dumb, it’s a dropdown box labelled “Type” that I had to toggle from “Native” to “NVIDIA”. Seriously what. H.265 only had the NVIDIA option. H.264 with the NVIDIA option selected processes faster than the H.265 one too, 2 hours instead of 3 for a 2 hour video recorded at 4k/60fps.

I also learnt more about Aegisub (local), ffmpeg (local), Handbreak (local), and learnt about the existence of MKVToolNix (local) and gMKVExtractGUI (local), all in the name of playing with slicing a portion of an MKV file (ffmpeg), extracting some fonts from it (the two MKV things), editing subtitles (Aegisub), and then putting it back together and burning the subtitles into a webm file (Handbreak) all so I could create the lyric video file I used down below in the Song of the Week. I suppose I could have just screen recorded the original MKV file or something to get the same result in a much shorter length of time, but that seems like a sin, plus this way I learnt quite a few things that I might be able to use in a future translation project or something. I’d like to do some fansubs for obscure anime someday. Kind of staggering how many different tools are needed though.

Outside of video recording shenanigans, I also starting backing up our Lord of the Rings Online guild website/forums this week, which I had found a couple weeks ago — abandoned and inactive but not quite yet deleted by the host website even though we hadn’t used the site in years. The posts on it range from 2011-2014, so it’s a valuable, nostalgic resource that I was happy to find still exists, and I started saving screenshots and HTML files of every page since the site didn’t have a forum export feature. It’s taking forever to do so it’s just another project on the list for now, though. It assumedly isn’t going anywhere in a hurry.

I’m very hesitant to do this, but this week also found me taking a peek at Singapore walking videos again (particularly this one) and thinking how nice it would be go back there now and see how much things have changed. I’ve been ruined by Japan/Covid twice already though and this Singapore attempt has other factors attached to it too, so I don’t really dare to dream too strongly yet. I would be setting myself up for disappointment. There’s plenty of time to dream later. I’ve also found myself on ambient/meditative/concentration/asian instrumental Youtube video pages a lot recently.

Besides that it doesn’t feel like I’ve done a whole ton recently. Lots of anime to watch this season. 30+ seasonals. Somewhat expensive and time-consuming hobby. Small odd things happened, like someone with a wrong number texting me from Los Angeles, and then introducing himself with his name and a friendly hello once he realized he had the wrong number. Almost decided to make friends with him. And I have some other things to watch and do that have been piling up over the past 3-4 months, since I am not carefree enough to allow myself enough time to do everything I want to during the semester. But now? I can burn a weeknight playing around with figuring out how to use a new program or fiddle with minutae all night long. Freeeeedom!


Freedom? What freedom? I actually barely played anything this week, as between anime, archiving, playing around with various video programs, and just general chitchat with friends, I didn’t have the time or willpower to game.

Ghostlore launches into Steam early access this next week, on April 14, and as long as they don’t launch with a ridiculous price, I’m going to buy that to support Singapore developers, and because I enjoyed the game when I played it during the last Steam Next Fest demo event. Is it a great game? No, but it was fun, and I enjoyed the touch of Southeast Asian lore as well as the chance to order a succulent dish of my favourite food (hokkien mee) in the game. Complete with mouth-watering picture. Lots of other food options too. I don’t think I’ve ever found any other game that let me do that, soooo. They really know how to cater to Singaporeans huh. Through the language of food!

On the phone, I hung out with a game called Pocket Love, which.. is not that good, in the sense that the only thing you really have to do is watch ads to unlock clothing and furniture options. But you get to create two characters who are supposedly in love and live together and adopt a pet or two too.

So I created two purely platonic girls (because the game fits that narrative too and I prefer that relationship) and tossed them into a house with a couple pet cats, and decorated it with whatever the game gave me.

I’ve stuck with it for surprisingly long considering that there’s nothing to do — it’s too bad there aren’t minigames or anything to play, or at least calming music so I could leave it on as a screensaver/virtual terrarium or something. Literally the only thing you can do in it is change clothes/hair/furniture, watch ads, and poke bugs or random npcs that spawn every few hours. And while there is background music, there’s no point leaving the volume on because the stupid 30 second ads when you’re collecting free furniture and stuff blare out the existence of their lousy games at maximum volume to compensate for how terrible they are. But it is sort of calming and zen, and I feel like there’s a shadow of a great (PC) game here, like a mini-Sims without all the complexity, focused around raising your characters and living life with them as their benevolent omniscient caretaker. Aargh. I haven’t sunk hundreds of hours into Sims 3 for years now, maybe it’s time again.

Plushie of the Week #46 – Jubjub

I apologize. I’m sorry you have to see this. Jubjub is certainly a colourful character, or was, depending on your point of view, and comes from a distinguished pedigree.. no, I can’t do this anymore. Look, he’s a ball of fuzz. That’s it. We still consider him a plushie though.

Just as Unicoron was my younger sister’s Grade 7 Home Education class craft project, Jubjub, whose name derives from the Neopets species JubJub (local), Jubjub was my younger brother, Jon‘s, Grade 7 Home Ed class project, so he would have come in to the family around December of 2005. According to Jon, he was picked because he was simply the cheapest kit on sale, although there was probably something to be said about the initial resemblance to the JubJub too, since he named the fuzzball after that thing.

Both of his feet have since fallen off, we still have one of them here and the other is probably somewhere in a box as well. His eyes are way too big and solid and shiny, to the point that you can see my reflection in it as I took pictures of him, and he has no detailed nose or mouth or.. anything else, really. I don’t remember much about him, but I believe he ran around saying “Jubjub!” a lot, and often tried to take part in plushie activities around the house. He came out of the bedroom and to the computer table downstairs where the main plushie group hung out a few times, and spent some time in Jon‘s bed together with Doggy as well. He has also been through and somehow survived the washerpocalypse a few times, even though it doesn’t look like he could endure such a thing at first glance. I do not seem to have any pictures of him with his feet attached, as we don’t have many surviving pictures from the 2006-2011 era.

Anyway, here’s Jubjub. Front:


And well.. that’s it, so here’s another front because I have two of that angle for some reason, and what else is there even to take a picture of? He’s a round fuzzball with no tag:

He kind of looks like an owl. What a hoot.

Song of the Week #23

Title: Hikare Inochi
Artist: Kitri
Album: Hikare Inochi (2021)

I usually alternate song languages, so while I have had consecutive English Songs of the Week, this will be the first time that I’ve had two consecutive Songs of the Week that are Japanese, but the timing for this one was hot because I had just finished Season 1 of the show that featured this song as its ending song, Komi-san wa, Comyushou desu., this week. This was so that I could properly start Season 2, which is airing this Spring 2022 season. Season 1 aired in Fall 2021, and this was the best song of that season for me.

I left two versions of the song here, the first one is the 90 second ending cut version of the song, with translated lyrics by the NovaWorks fansub group, that I fiddled around until I figured out how to slap it onto another video version of the ending song video. The second is the full-length video and song from the singer’s official Youtube page. The second video has English subtitles in closed captions as well, but they’re not good at all. The NovaWorks version is much more poignant and proper and I relate to it a lot more, so here we are several hours later.

Anyway. I liked this song when I first heard of it, and loved it more and more each time I heard it, since it played multiple times due to being used as the main ending song for the show. I didn’t understand all the lyrics, but I knew Hikare Inochi (which I translated as My Shining Life) and I liked how the chorus pivoted around two uses of the word sakebu, or “to shout”, with a little pause before and after the word to make it really stand out. That plus the general melody and voice made it a very pleasant and inspirational song for me, pushing me forward in life, even without understanding every individual line.

This translation really took it over the top for me though, because of the mood it set. I really related to it. Not to the characters in the show, mind you, but just of this song in particular. An extraction of the lyrics in the 90s video below reads as follows:

The sun rises again and yet no one knows
how much of a coward I really am.
I hide it beneath my face, riding the train like always.
Just a girl wearing a bright smile
and staring off into space.
I let all my experiences
flow straight through me
like the wind blows over an open moor.

My light is shining bright
I shout from the depths of my heart.
No matter how discouraged I might get
This pretty sky and your kind words
will keep me going forward.
My future shines bright
I’ll keep shouting until I’m heard
I’ll float along the river of life no matter where it goes.
If you’ll be here with me for another day
Then this is how I want my life
I’ll live it proudly.

And to me, I thought:

The sun rises again and yet no one knows
how much of a coward I really am.
I hide it beneath my face, riding the train like always.

I haven’t covered this in a Memory Snippet of the Week yet, but one of my guiding lights is a little postcard-sized inspirational poster beside me that reads, “If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough.” (Edit: now I have, see MSotW #74.)

Just a girl wearing a bright smile
and staring off into space.

Yupyup. Pisces thing. I was blatantly accused of this last week.

I let all my experiences
flow straight through me
like the wind blows over an open moor.

Blog reference. But also I’m very wind-centric, if you haven’t been able to tell by some of my earlier Things I Am Thankful For This Week segments as well as the way I describe many of my Song of the Week feelings — the idea of closing my eyes and dancing and twirling up into the clouds, or things like a camera panning across broad, swirling, windswept landscapes.

My light is shining bright
I shout from the depths of my heart.

My future shines bright
I’ll keep shouting until I’m heard

The two “shouting” couplets. I do believe I am in a very happy place now and that life is full of many interesting things that I have the chance to enjoy, just by virtue of being alive, relatively secure, and able. Sure, having to go into depression a couple times in the past sucked, but I’m out of that now and facing forwards. Sure, having my study abroad thing being postponed twice sucks, and may scuttle my dream of ever going to Japan, but there are other things I can do and things to look forward to still.

No matter how discouraged I might get
This pretty sky and your kind words
will keep me going forward.

I’ll float along the river of life no matter where it goes.
If you’ll be here with me for another day
Then this is how I want my life
I’ll live it proudly.

These parts duet in and out with the “shouting” couplets of the chorus, and these are references to my dear friends, of course. Multiple groups of them even. You know who you are and why you are important to me. It means that even as I look forward to the future, I will also cherish and remember the past and the people whom I once knew, until I can no longer do so.

And that is why this song means a lot to me. It might have references to the past, but to me it doesn’t represent the past by itself, nor does it carry any emotional baggage or anything like that. It might have references to the future, but it doesn’t dare to dream too much, except in a vague sense, it doesn’t paint a picture of, nor hinge on, a future goal that might or might not come true, or speculate on how I might feel in the future, or anything like that. Instead, it’s a song that strongly represents the present for me, a balance between the past that made me who I am, the unknown future that I wish to head towards, and the present people and feelings that I rely on. It’s very much a theme song representative of the “right now”, the current moment in time and the power of living in that mindset, and I don’t have m/any other songs like that in my repertoire that don’t also come burdened down with old memories. Perhaps in the future it will accummulate its own baggage and connotation of 2022 Jessica and how good/bad life was back then, but for now it is living, shouting, and running, on its own two feet.

And I love it!

Memory Snippet of the Week #30

I’ve had many teachers in my school career, some good, some.. not so good. But I’ve only ever had one teacher that I’d consider outright bad. Even the Chinese 301/302 teacher that I was really mad with about a year ago, not long after I started writing my blogs, wasn’t a bad teacher, she just was a poor grader and an average, but relatively fun and nice in class, instructor. While I would not be interested in going out for a cup of tea with her, or ever helping or chatting with her again in any capacity, I don’t actively consider her a bad teacher, we just didn’t mesh.

However, when I was 8-9 years old, in my Primary 3 (Grade 3) year in Peiying Primary School in Singapore, I encountered the only teacher in my life whom I actively hated and still despise to this day. This was back in 1993, so I’ll even name and shame him — he was our class’s form teacher and art teacher, Mr Aziz. Mr Abdul Aziz, according to my report card. I’m not sure that’s his full name, though I’m not sure what is, the additional name Azzim/Azim or Assim/Asim or something also came to mind but I don’t know if that’s a red herring.

Anyway. In Singapore, how classes work is that when a teacher enters the room, the class monitor will call everyone to stand, and then bow, and everyone will greet the teacher. The teacher will then allow everyone to sit down and class will proceed. At the end of the class, this repeats with a farewell once the teacher announces that the class is over, before the teacher leaves. Sometimes, if the class is in trouble due to some mischievous behaviour or did poorly on tests or something, the teacher will make everyone remain standing after the greeting as s/he gives a lecture, prior to actually starting the lesson. Or if the class went really badly because we were rowdy or something, the teacher might command that we remain standing after the farewell at the end of the class, until the next teacher arrives. And most of the time, the previous teacher will wait for the next teacher to tell them about the class, and let him/her play good cop after, or if they don’t meet then the next teacher will just come in and survey the room, realize what happened, make a wry comment telling us to make sure we’re behaved or something, and then go through the usual greeting before letting us sit down. It’s a very passive, low-end sort of punishment.

But this fucking teacher. This “art teacher” would regularly come in and spend his entire timeslot (30ish minutes? 60ish minutes?) ranting to us about his job, his low salary, society, or whatever else happened to irk his ego that day. And he would often keep us standing for the entire class after the greeting, refusing to let us sit down as he rambled on and on about his own personal hardship and job dissatisfaction, as though us 8 and 9 year olds could do anything about it or were at fault for his immature behaviour. And then he would leave the class, sometimes not letting us sit down until the next teacher came. Like what, was your misfortune or unhappiness our fault? And 8 and 9 year olds were not going to speak up against a teacher, much less be supported if the teacher told another adult about our “misbehaviour”, nor could we say anything to appease him, so we were basically his captive audience. I remember my legs aching at the end of some of his rant sessions after half an hour or longer of watching him pace up and down the front of the class as he whined.

I believe art classes were held once a week, and he didn’t do this every week, he had classes where he probably tried to teach us too, I don’t remember any of it though. As our form teacher, he would also have had a start or end of day class slot with us sometimes, but I think he couldn’t really do anything in those. I do know that I dreaded his art classes, as it was a complete waste of time where we could do nothing else, though I remember looking forward to it once or twice as well when I was feeling lazy and not wanting to do anything else that day. He also had classes where he’d rant for a few minutes or half the class or something and then let us sit. Point being it didn’t happen every single class. But it happened on a lot of them, at least once every 3 or 4 weeks if not bimonthly for the entire year, and he was a big pain(t) in the rear. I daresay a big reason that I had no interest in art in later primary school and early secondary school was due to this walking meatbag that somehow found a way to pull a salary while contributing negative value to society.

I don’t know what happened to him as I left the school that year — I aced the Primary 3 end of year GEP test and got transferred to the gifted class in Rosyth, but I do regret that he probably had some accolades for being the form teacher of the class that spawned the first ever GEP student for Peiying. I hope he got caught or had a complaint lodged against him and got fired at some point and ended up with an even lower paying job.


I didn’t have that many dreams this week, but they were kind of exhausting. There was one that left me a bit sad on the 7th, then a murderish one on the 9th that left me a bit exhausted, and then a horrific set of scenes on the 10th that left me even more exhausted and feeling weird (like a mix between feeling down and guilty, and a dulled sensation) for that day. Viewer discretion is advised?

Apr 06 2022
  • I was designing a zone in an MMO-like game, except there weren’t many players in the game, just me and a few friends. I was designing a map puzzle that was shaped like a dragon, where you’d enter at its “tail” and work your way to its head, where you’d find a clue or key that led you to a treasure panel hidden at the tail area, at the very front of the zone, which you could then collect on your way out of the zone. It was also to be Dark Souls inspired in some regard, though I’m not sure how.
  • That dream segment was somehow mixed in with work somehow so my work team was having a team meeting outside the game too, where people pulled questions from a box and answered them in front of the rest of the team. I refused to go to the meeting because Trin had plugged in a USB into the computer that I was using for work and was using to design the zone as well, among other things. That USB contained some spyware or adware that would display advertisements to raise more money for the company, but I hated it and managed to remove it after some time. Not going to that meeting was somehow important to ensure that the adware stayed off my computer for as long as possible.
  • Snippet: At one point, there was a story or magazine or something that contained Part 1 of a tale between two spiders that were best friends, and another thing containing Part 2 of the story. I looked through the Part 2 one, and saw that they were living in Minnesota around an ice rink, and that one of the spiders had become beautiful after taking a dip in a pond, since the water neatly flattened her bristly parts against her body.
Apr 07 2022
  • I dreamt that I had an impromptu friends-gathering place in my Edmonton 205 apartment. Everyone from my Dunman High class came, the Service Desk from work was invited and one person from there came, Mom and Jon came, and LittleStranger from an online Discord server came, too. I even took two pictures of him.
  • Brandon had put in the Service Desk group chat at work that there was an after-work party happening at my place, but he referred to me as Shiara. He said he had received the invitation from a friend and said that a mutual friend who had stopped by the SD to regale the team with 12 stories at some point in the past, would be there too, so they’d at least know me and him even if they didn’t know anyone else.
  • From the Dunman side, I remember at least Paulene, Huihan, Eileen, and Paul showing up, though I knew that everyone from the WhatsApp chat was basically there, so nearly 30 people in all. They explored my apartment and found a room in a closet I never knew about, that led to a room with pink carpet and an exercise machine and secondary toilet in it. Kind of like the hidden bathroom in the closet that we had in our Yishun 723 home.
  • We hung out for some time before everyone left together. As they were leaving, I heard Paul talking to my Mom about some groceries she was carrying and how one of them said she needed to come back up and leave it at my place as a gift. I opened the door when I heard them mention my name and Mom and Jon came back up the stairs and into my apartment. She took out a bowl and placed a couple rice noodle rolls (chee cheong fun) with soya sauce into it, cut into six pieces, and then started eating a couple and invited me to eat the rest as well. We hung out that way for a few minutes more before she left again.
  • I was appreciative for this not for the free food, but because I was already severely missing my friends even though they had only just left, as I knew it would be a long time before I would see them again. Mom coming back up helped calm me down. Still, as she left, I wished that I could welcome all of them home at the end of every working day.
Apr 09 2022

Dream 1

  • There was a swimming pool complex owned by a bland Nice Guy anime protagonist and his mom. They had a secret plan to lure people in by dumping a cast-iron pot of colourful coins into the pool as sunken treasure, and enticing people into “noticing” that treasure, quietly renting time at the pool to not alert others of the treasure, and then they would drown and/or kill the guest while he/she tried to retrieve the treasure and take his or her possessions for themselves, and the guest would be an easy kill because they’d have made the effort to keep their find hidden out of greed, and so wouldn’t be able to call for help from anyone.
  • That day though, I was coming to that pool with two female friends whom I apparently knew from an in-dream school, and I was the one who noticed the treasure from the outside of the pool, which was kind of like a seal tank at the zoo, it had places in the wall where you could look into the pool’s depths through a plastic or glass barrier. I didn’t actually need the treasure/money though, whereas my two friends did, so I told them about it and guided them to retrieve the treasure. I realized I had also seen the mom and boy dragging the pot over a platform hanging above the pool earlier, and figured that they had put it in as an extra surprise challenge/gift as a marketing ploy, rather than a plot to murder someone.
  • This foiled their plans and they stood to lose a lot of money. They tried killing one of the girls anyway and she almost drowned because a suspiciously jutting out platform appeared above her head as she was surfacing, but as I was outside the pool, I saw this and was able to guide her to swim forward and then up, and she broke the surface successfully. I watched the rest of the sunken treasure rescue efforts closely and the mom and boy were unable to do anything. I also found a secondary sunken treasure pile and the two girls retrieved (and kept) that, too.
  • The next part is unclear but the mom/boy had a plan B, which was to hire an assassin to kill us. I also had other friends who came along to join us at some point. I’m not sure if the assassin part was foiled just like that, or fell through in another way, or blended together with the next part of the dream.
  • The next part of the dream involved me near the front counter where a part-timer girl was selling pool tickets. A belligerent man came along and was trying to sign up for some promotion event mentioned on a poster on the wall that expired in May 2020, despite it being nearly May 2022. He pretended he couldn’t understand the brochure which said May 2020, just because it had another unrelated line in the poster that said May 2022 and so that must have meant that the event hadn’t fully concluded yet, and he insisted he should be allowed to join in. The girl apologized and refused and he gave her a verbal tirade and stormed off.
  • I saw this, and threw a tub of water at him over a large glass pillar in the middle of the lobby we were all in, in revenge for his actions on the girl. The lobby had several different doorways leading to different personal rooms with pools. I knew at this point that he was “evil” as well, but I couldn’t prove it, but this gave me the chance as he stormed into his side room to change, and then stormed into our side room, where I and a few friends were. He was in a seething rage, saw and targetted me, and came my way, and I realized that Tigey was beside me and was suddenly afraid that Tigey would bare the brunt of his rage. I smirked, pressing myself against the back of the wall, and said to him that everything I owned was in a backpack that I was wearing on my back and there was no way he would be able to do anything, feigning innocence about Tigey. This worked, thankfully.
  • The entire event at this point had game-like RPG stats. But this was a “game” structured like a MOBA, where we picked a class and slowly levelled up in it but our levels and everything were reset at the end of each “map” or “day” or whatever. I was a rogue that day, and I was level 4, as were my friends, as well as the evil man attacking me. I used some obscure mechanic to split myself into two or something, and essentially sacrificed my levels, resetting myself back to level 1, and my mirror image saved one of my other friends and got itself killed by the man to “prove” or reveal his evil identity to everyone else, and also so that my friends would also realize I was in trouble and come to my aid.
  • The fight proceeded as they joined the fray on my side. I was effectively useless since I was lower in level than everyone else now, especially since Rogues were largely useless in a battle until level 6, which everyone else reached long before me. I did get some of my avoidance abilities back as I slowly levelled too though, and I used those to stay out of trouble while flitting in and out of the area as a distraction. The actual fight was a blur, and involved a lot of insider knowledge of some sort, possibly including things like meta knowledge of the area, the use of the mom/boy’s trap, a mechanic where we could pause and plan our next move, and possibly even a save/load game process. At any rate, he was difficult to beat, but my friends won out over him due to sheer numbers in the end, and he drowned in the pool.
  • I was asked by a clueless bystander after the fight why I would pick such a useless class if I didn’t intend to beeline it right to level 6. He had watched the fight from the outside but had been clueless about the sacrifice I had made, since no one had noticed the man being on a rampage before he rather noisily murdered my mirror image. Instead, he assumed that I had also levelled at the same rate at everyone else but had spent my skill points on some other passive or side skills or something. I just rolled my eyes at him and left with my friends.
  • Lastly, I went with said friends to a cafe on the second floor of an airport lounge, where we sat at a table and had some breakfast. We saw a TV news report that police had investigated the incident at the pool, found the body and the murder mechanism, and had questioned the owners over it. The mom feigned innocence, pushing the blame to the boy, who had the special skill of splitting into several copies of himself, which only served to further implicate him to the cops as the murderer, since that would allow him to be in several places at once. They captured all his copies, and his dad, who was clueless as to the actual plot but had arrived in time to be interviewed, was really disappointed in what he had done. We looked out the lounge window at the airport and saw a couple helicopters taking off with a large cage attached between them, inside of which were all the copies of the stupid bland male anime romcom protagonist staring out through the bars as they were being transferred to a faraway prison.
  • I also met a friend who had seen the news and who asked if I had heard what went on in the pool. I said that I had not only heard of it, I had instigated the whole thing by finding the treasure in the first place, and then unmasking the evil man, and I could fill him in on the actual story and what the news missed if he wanted, since it was just an hour and a half ago and I wanted to put it on my blog eventually.

Dream 2

  • This dream took place in a post-apocalyptic world, where a class of about 15-20 people that I was in at night barricaded ourselves in our classroom as night turned into dawn. This was because in this post-apoc world, the temperatures were really hot during the day, and closing the windows and windows and blinds would help prevent the heat from coming in. There were blinds and a window next to the door behind the teacher’s desk, and I asked permission to close them, and she agreed. Before I did so, I stared at the slowly rising sun, which was a pale circle in the smoggy sky.
  • There were also some people not allowed in due to some change or mutation or something they had, and at one point I went out with one of them that was a friend, dropped down a hole in the ground, and ended up at some underground tunnel near the classroom to see where people like them took shelter instead. I sat down on the broken ground with my friend, with our backs against the wall, as we chatted.
  • At another point, I remember thinking that Eileen and Allen were trapped outside, but upon looking around the classroom I saw them sitting together a table. I proposed setting up a big whiteboard near the door where we could do attendance, though.
  • At a third point, I talked to Lukasz from work, and told him about a scholarship revolving around a programming- or computer-related anime which you could apply for to sponsor travel to Japan or something on a work experience exchange, even in this post-apoc world. He said he liked that anime and would look into it, and later told me that he had applied successfully.
Apr 10 2022
  • I dreamt that one of the members of a 9-person girl idol group suddenly died in a supermarket, in the middle of shooting a video of some kind, and they were unable to resurrect her so her best friend, as well as a guy friend that was nearby, took her body as well as her half-finished recording and preserved them in a private laboratory washroom so they could try to figure out how to resurrect her in the future. But it was to no avail, and it was particularly sad because five years after her death, when her death anniversary rolled around, people were singing her character theme song but most of the words had either become forgotten or had been toned down and replaced with lesser words due to memory and the passage of time.. things like a part of the song where her name was sung was being hummed instead because people were starting to forget it, and “I will always remember you” turning into “I will sometimes remember you” and so on in the lyrics. It was gut-wrenching and I had to turn away from the male friend as he sat on a bench and cried so I wouldn’t see him and start weeping too even though I was already teared out from earlier on in the scene.
  • Then there was a second scene, earlier on, where there was a swimming pool in another laboratory room with random monsters in it that would spawn and despawn over a set amount of time, which was part of an experiment that was going on, and we were told to avoid the pool because currently an orca shark was in it. But a good friend of mine had a pet cat or something that jumped into the pool, so she jumped in as well, trying to grab and rescue it and get out quickly. She failed and got destroyed by the shark, her limbs torn off etc. I ran over to a control panel in a room to the south to resurrect her, though I remember that it had a moderate chance of succeeding, a moderate chance of a partial succeed (zombie which had happened the last time we tried to use it), and a 15% chance or so of failure, possibly with the caster’s death too, but I did it anyway and I think it worked but I’m not sure how it ended.
  • And then in between, there was a part where either the scenes melded together into one or there was a variant of the second scene as a third separate scene entirely, but a male friend who was not really allowed in the lab but was passing by as a friend of mine, approached either a person at the resurrection control panel in the last scene (but in a different variant of the scene so she wasn’t “me”), or the idol in the supermarket in the first scene, and lunged at them with a knife, stabbed them to death in the stomach, before walking away. I argued with the person afterwards on why he had betrayed our friendship and done that, and I was very upset at that, but he was uncaring as he had some sort of reason for the murder.
  • Snippet: At some point earlier on, during happier times, I remember we were having a pool/hot springs party in another room in the laboratory area. The makeup of the laboratory staff was all female, and I and a friend were in it, naked and uncaring, when a cleaning staff member wandered in at some point as he wanted to partake in it as well. He even identified himself with his staff ID card when challenged. Another colleague came in and yelled at him and chased him out in the room however. Eventually more of our colleagues joined and we had a pretty good time.
  • Snippet: At another point, there were train or weird vehicle races on roller-coaster like tracks that ran through some sort of void, it was probably for an experiment but I don’t remember much detail on it, just a particular scene near the end with me and someone else racing on separate tracks.
  • Editor: This was particularly haunting because I remember all the victims/perps too, the first scene’s idol was an animated character from the 22/7 Japanese idol group, the shark victim in the second scene was Satinel, and the intruder in the third scene was Melbourne from work. This was a distressing and exhausting dream and I had no idea why so many gruesome and sad death scenes all happened at once.

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